It had me thinking is this really helpful? I have definitely had friends or spoken to people who have felt stressed or wondered if someone was mad, ignoring or avoiding them just by seeing that their message had been seen and read by the person they sent it too. The same can be said by someone "liking" a message or NOT liking a message. Most of the time, it's not personal. The sender may be busy or have forgotten. But this feature, which is now being adopted by virtually all text based communication online, is causing the way we communicate to change.
We often forget that 80% of communication is body language. But for more than a decade now, we have gotten further and further away from that and most of our communications are no longer in person or even by Skype or Face Time, but primarily text based. Where tone, inflection and eye contact are rendered obsolete.
I know I have definitely waited with butterflies in my stomach for a message to be returned. Just last week a friend of mine caught herself wondering if a guy she liked, was not interested in her anymore because she could see he definitely read her message!
So if these new features (which can't always be disabled depending on what app you are using) is sticking around, how can we better manage our feelings and emotions around it?
I think for me, Mindfulness and self compassion can play a huge role. Depending on the source of the message and the relationship with the person we are engaging with, we may need to accept that we might feel a moment of dread or anticipation in seeing that a message was indeed seen and read but not yet returned. Instead of fighting that feeling we note it gently and bring ourselves back to the present moment. By gently noting how we feel and accepting it for the moment, we are less likely to impulsively respond to the sender with assumptions of why they have yet to get back to us. It can also decrease ruminating on the millions of reasons our brains will come up with on why we feel ignored.
What are your thoughts on the Seen,Liked and Read features in texting?
-Have you felt anticipating, dread, anger or sadness because you knew your message was received but not yet responded to?
-What do you think could help us better cope with these features and what has helped you to not jump to conclusions while waiting for a response?
Look forward to your thoughts bellow!