It wasn't the first time tho. I've called people that offensive word even though intention was not bad, but still offends. I wanna share body positivity but in fact that is offensive to do so.
I've had this nice friend of mine who was my inspiration on instagram, and he was always there for me in bad times. But what I did today to him was unforgivable... I wanted to tell him how attractive he is, but somehow I rushed and without thinking I offended on his looks (not saying). I didn't mean to say it in an offensive way, but it did hurt him and it was my fault.
I've called many people that word and I kinda feel worse that I haven't let go my bad habit of bullying. I need to train myself to stop, but I can't help it. I'm not always sad, so that's why most of time my thoughts are clear, but when I'm sad no.
Now all of his friends bully me for that and I understand. Help me find apps, resources or anything to stop myself. I installed rethink keyboard, but there should be more